Munchkin News

|

September 4, 2018

Stay At Home Mom Schedule: 100 Things I Did For My Kids Today

Being a mom is everything I ever dreamed of and so much more.

Every mom’s list looks different, but in one 24 hour period, I did the following* for my three kids:

  1. Got up, filled up a sippy cup, and delivered it to a thirsty toddler
  2. Picked up underwear on bathroom floor (note: suspiciously wet)
  3. Turned off a fan, sound machine, and bedside lamp
  4. Made oatmeal just the way they like it
  5. Turned off the TV/side-stepped an argument
  6. Changed a dirty diaper
  7. Half-dressed two year old (He ran off when I turned my attention to said shirt fight below)
  8. Mediated a fight over who gets to wear the ‘Lego shirt’
  9. Packed two lunches with the weirdest leftover snacks and fruit in our house (we need to go grocery shopping)
  10. Helped sound out the word “stomachs” while making lunches
  11. Confidently discussed Bumble Bee and Blaze with four-year-old while making lunches
  12. Filled a sippy cup with water, toddler screams, dumped it out, filled with milk instead while making lunches
  13. Reminded everyone to put on their shoes, grab a sweatshirt, and get their backpack. “Don’t forget your lunch!” x 10 times
  14. Cuddled two year old while he sucks his thumb
  15. We listen to my son read Elephant and Piggie while my husband does preschool drop-off.
  16. Hug, kiss, wave goodbye to Kindergartner (Did you get your folder? Lunch? Jacket?)
  17. Finish dressing two year old. I guess he needs pants?
  18. Straighten and vacuum living room to create the illusion of order post-school
  19. Wash dishes, clear table, sanitize everything so we don’t all die from weird diseases
  20. Throw in a load of laundry (1/15 every week)
  21. Cuddle two year old while he sucks his thumb and breathe in his scent. This child is cute. Then he elbows my pregnant belly. Moment over.
  22.  Drive to three different grocery stores to get the food we all like.
  23.  Come home, unload groceries, make a snack fit for a Baby King
  24.  Make a snack fit for a Mama Queen (a hangry mom is a mean mom)
  25.  Chop a few vegetables and throw in some broth and chicken into the Instant Pot and hope for the best.
  26.  Rotate laundry
  27. Wash dishes
  28. Clear table
  29. Wipe toddler’s face and hands
  30. Change toddler’s wet diaper
  31. Venture upstairs to straighten the kids’ room and change their sheets
  32. Listen to podcasts whilst doing all of this (this makes domestic chores tolerable aka get done)
  33. Clean bathroom
  34. Try to convince toddler to not help me scrub the toilet with his brother’s toothbrush
  35.  Order diapers! (Crap, that was close.)
  36.  Since I’m already on my computer, I respond to a Kindergarten potluck email.
  37.  And another about the preschool yearbook
  38.  And another three about future playdates.
  39.  And since I see the reminder on my Google Calendar, I call Kaiser and schedule two well-checks and a specialist appointment.
  40.  Sit down and cuddle toddler again. He kind of smells weird. We play cars for five minutes.
  41.  I look at my phone. Remember I haven’t sent pictures of the kids to their grandparents for ages, so I pick the top three and text them to each set.
  42.  Check Google Docs to see if my client has any feedback on my most recent edits.
  43.  Make lunch for toddler and I.
  44.  Eat soup together and sing Baby Beluga. Did I mention this two year old is cute?
  45.  Prep tupperware of snacks and throw it in the double stroller. We’re walking to preschool pick-up today.
  46.  Walk past our favorite neighbor’s house so toddler can wave at his favorite human.
  47.  Walk uphill to preschool pushing 36 lb toddler. My 8 month pregnant body can barely handle it.
  48.  Text a few friends to coordinate a park meet-up later that afternoon
  49.  Arrive at preschool, sign kid out. This is a symbol of my love. I hate doing this.
  50.  Convince four year old walking home with the stroller will be fun.
  51.  Push two kids .5 mile to the elementary school where we hang out and wait for school to get out.
  52.  Hug Kindergartner and gauge his mood. Determine the next hour’s activities for the four of us based on this assumption.
  53.  Walk home together.
  54.  Promise time-outs for any more whining.
  55.  Promise a really good afternoon snack that doesn’t exist. Yet.
  56.  Make food for the four of us while two year old cries at my leg (skipped nap), four year old tells me about setting “boomy traps” for Arthur, and six year old bemoans how short lunch recess was
  57.  Set up food on the back porch and eat together. Walk the delicate balance of hangry but still functioning.
  58.  Make a plan together. Choose which park we should go to, whether we take scooters, and which friends we should meet up with.
  59. Quickly throw a bunch of weird snacks and cheese sticks into a tote bag. And water!
  60.  Remind everyone to use the bathroom before we go. X 5
  61.  Grab toddler’s sandals on the way out the door.
  62.  Drive to park and feel the sweet relief of a fenced-in outdoor play area with playmates.
  63.  Help four year old in the potty. Because he “forgot” to go before we left.
  64.  Try to keep two year old out of the park bathroom.
  65.  Slather sunscreen on all three of them and myself.
  66.  Remind them if they throw sand, we’re leaving.
  67. Remind them if they hit each other, we’re leaving.
  68. Remind them if they whine and act bored, we leave to go home and do jobs.
  69.  I relax on a blanket and talk with friends. And eat snacks. (This makes me happy = happier mom for my kids)
  70.  Mediate a sand toy dispute.
  71.  Hug a crying boy. (Any one of the three, or all three.)
  72.  Clean a boo-boo and put on a Band-Aid.
  73.  Ask everyone if they’re thirsty and make them drink water.
  74.  Round up loose sandals and sand toys and kids and say goodbye to friends.
  75.  Rack my brain for dinner plans as I’m driving home. Remember the Instant Pot!
  76.  Order everyone to strip on the porch so 14 lbs of sand don’t get dragged into the house.
  77.  Bathe three kids simultaneously.
  78.  Threaten to confiscate bath toys and squirt guns, again.
  79.  Laughed at how cute they are all together.
  80.  Made a plan for what bedtime books to read.
  81.  Drained tub, dried off kids, dressed two year old in pajamas
  82.  Applied lotion on everybody
  83.  Told older brother to “take a break”
  84.  Dished up soup. Everybody refused to eat it.
  85.  Except the two year old. Because he’s the best.
  86.  Toast four pieces of organic sprouted grain bread and dish up full fat yogurt and local honey. They eat 40% of it.
  87. Herd everyone upstairs. Or try.
  88. Get too tired and we all sit on the couch and hang out for twenty minutes.
  89.  Rally again, get everyone upstairs.
  90.  Enforce tooth brushing
  91.  Enforce potty, flushing, and hand washing
  92.  Wash four year old’s glasses with signature “super wash”. Heart melts.
  93.  Cuddle up in bottom bunk to read. I pretend I’m comfortable.
  94.  Somebody hits somebody else and I threaten no more reading time.
  95.  We read another three more books.
  96.  Two year old tackles us all and gets banned to his toddler bed.
  97.  Other two start crying and now everyone has to go to their beds.
  98.  I rub backs, play with hair, and listen to their chatter for a few minutes.
  99.  Say a prayer of gratitude together, whisper I love you into each of their ears, and turn on the sound machine, Sonos speaker for lullabies, and a bedside lamp.
  100. Go back in several times before I go to bed to admire their sleeping faces and perfect, sprawled-out bodies. Hold my belly and shake my head in awe and utter and complete exhaustion.

*Probably missed 100 more things.

Koseli Cummings

Koseli is a copywriter based in the Bay Area whose clients include Airbnb, Penguin, Red Tricycle, and Design Mom. When she's not writing or podcasting, you can bet she's at a Berkeley park with her four boys.